The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: What is BDSM?!

The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: What is BDSM?!: BDSM  is a variety of erotic practices involving  dominance and submission , role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics. Giv...

What is BDSM?!

BDSM is a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who don't consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community and/or subculture is usually dependent on self-identification and shared experience. Interest in BDSM can range from one-time experimentation to a lifestyle, and there is debate over whether a BDSM or kink sexual identity also constitutes a form of sexual orientation.

The BDSM initialism

The term BDSM dates back to 1969,however the origin of the term BDSM is unclear, and is believed to have been formed either from joining the term B&D (bondage and discipline) with S&M (sadomasochism or sadism and masochism), or as a compound initialism from B&D, D&S (dominance and submission), and S&M. Regardless of its origin, BDSM is used as a catch-all phrase to include a wide range of activities, forms of interpersonal relationships, and distinct subcultures. BDSM communities generally welcome anyone with a non-normative streak who identifies with the community; this may include cross-dressers, extreme body mod enthusiasts, animal players, latex or rubber aficionados, and others.

Unlike the usual "power neutral" relationships and play styles commonly followed by couples, activities and relationships within a BDSM context are often characterized by the participants' taking on complementary, but unequal roles; thus, the idea of informed consent of both the partners becomes essential. Participants who exert sexual control over their partners are known as dominants or tops while participants who take the passive, receiving, or obedient role are known as submissives or bottoms. Individuals who alternate between top/dominant and bottom/submissive roles – whether from relationship to relationship or within a given relationship – are known as switches, though the term is occasionally seen as derogatory and is rejected by many who might simplistically fit the definition. Precise definition of roles and self-identification is a common subject of debate, reflection, and discussion within the community.

Keep following me guys as we enter this new world of BDSM, don't forget to like comment and share. 

XOXO SASH....

Supporting your Husband

Many of times we take our husbands for granted, he's working to much or don't ever have time for you and the kids. I have been a victim of this as well, until time brought reason and understanding.

Yes he works alot but it is for the benefit of you and the kids, I realized I have been very selfish in my actions and my emotions; I did not take into consideration that a man has to work twice as hard as a woman to accomplish goals and take care of a family. While some of us (housewives) have the luxury of sleeping late and having random naps during the day or having a spa date with the girls, we have that time and luxury while our man is out working.

Yes taking care of a house and kids is quite stressful and we do deserve those luxuries but what about your husband? how much time does he have for himself? 

Our job and duties as women is to keep the family together and of course still find the time to look beautiful and keep our husbands interested. 

We should do that, as a wife you need to make sure you look beautiful, smell wonderful all the time and when your man comes home he should be welcomed to that. A beautiful wife that smells wonderful and you should also have a nice hot meal prepared and something to drink, you should always ask your husband how was his day, give him a light massage while he talks about his day, make him feel interested, loved and wanted.

This is the standards of a good wife and contributes to a healthy marriage. As mentioned in my previous blogs where I wrote about sex tips and sex talk to spice up your marriage, feel free to check that out when you have some time. 

Now ladies this is considered as supporting your husband, you may not be able to work and support financially but the moral support of a loving wife aids as motivation for him to work harder to make your lives happier. So next time you decide to quarrel with your husband for not making the time; you take the time and consider all the things I just wrote about and be the good wife because in the end it pays off. 

So my friends keep smiling and feel free to comment and follow me on gmail, lets have fun sharing and learning.

Doing it right!

Are you doing it right?

Many mind-blowing orgasms have come from riding a guy—that's right, ladies, don't be afraid of getting on top! If you're busty, there's no need to be self-conscious about your girls flying everywhere. Just keep a lacy bra on so that you can focus on the more important things, like how amazing it feels

Try these easy sex tips to spice things up:

All Tied Up

His favorite tie doesn’t have to stay around his neck. Have him put that Windsor knot to good use around your wrists the next time you hit the sack

Play it by Ear

Nibble, lick, blow, or purr in his ear to send a tantalizing sensation throughout his body. Bonus points if you covertly try it in a crowded room.

Riding Solo

Allow your main squeeze to watch you pleasure yourself. Not only will it help him get aroused, but it feels great for you, and it shows him exactly what you like.

Crown Jewels

Lightly tug on your guy's jewels during oral sex. Just remember to be very careful—we'd hate to be partially responsible for, um, ruining the moment.

Edible Engagements

Explore food options in the bedroom, such as chocolate, strawberries, and candy necklaces. Or greet him in a whipped cream bikini. Yum!

Whet His Appetite

Tell him to feel how wet you are before you even start hooking up. Men love to know that they're turning you on, and this is one of the easiest and most honest ways to show it!

House Play

Challenge your mate to do it in every room of your house or apartment. If you quickly run out of rooms (frisky, frisky!), just repeat the whole process.

Tell me how it goes guys...and remember stay tuned for exciting sex tips and ways to spice up the bedroom 

The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: SEX AFTER MARRIAGE

The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: SEX AFTER MARRIAGE: DATE HIM AGAIN. Date nights are a must. Mid-week, get out of those sweats and dress up -- and no talking about mortgages, sick parents ...

The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: Broken or Just Bent?

The Secret Life of a Trini Housewife: Broken or Just Bent?: Are we Broken or Just bent? this song is so relevant to most of our marriages right now. Give each other a reason to learn to love ag...

Broken or Just Bent?

Are we Broken or Just bent?

this song is so relevant to most of our marriages right now.

Give each other a reason to learn to love again.

Have fun listening guys

And just remember its not over it just need a little work..

LIE TO SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE!?

Do you agree with the statement "lie to save your marriage" ?

How many secrets is to much secrets? Do you know for sure your partner is completely honest with you?

Here is my point of view and maybe a little advice.

Take a little quiz about your marriage and ask your self these questions.

1. Where is my partner right now?
2. Does he/she really like the things i like? or does he/she  participate just to make me happy?
3. Do you know the password to your partner's phone, laptop or other personal items?
4. How often does your partner go on business trips? Do you know where he/she is staying?
5. Does your partner have a secret room, secret box, secret something that you are not allowed access? 
6. Is my partner really happy in this union? Or are we just comfortable with each other?
7. How is the sex? Fine, Satisfactory, need some work, Awesome everytime, No we dont have sex. ?
8. What activities you do as a couple?
9. Do you feel jealous if your partner looks at a beautiful woman or a handsome men?
10. Is the answers to all these questions I previously answered mutual?

Okay, after the little questionnaire/quiz what do you make of your marriage? Is it working for you? Is it working for your partner?

If it is, even if most of it are lies, are you okay living with the situation? would you rather tell the truth or do you choose to continue lying?

So enough about the questions already right..lol 

Here is my take on Lying to Save your Marriage

I think as human beings men and women everyone needs there space. There is that personal space we all need, yes we love our partner and we wanna make our marriage work, but that does not give you or your partner the right to invade personal space. If you like to go fishing in your personal space that is your right. We do not own the people in our lives, we share time with them and most times we forget and  feel we own them but we dont. So give your partner that space he/she needs, in that way you give your partner something to think about and less of a reason to lie.

The next mistake we make is getting jealous and starting a brawl if your partner looks at a beautiful woman or man. Seriously STOP IT NOW!!! We are human if we see something beautiful we look, that doesnt mean we are going to leave you and start a new family with the random stranger on the street. Because believe it or not when you are not around we do look! So save yourself the drama and just allow your partner to look, it might even work out for the best, who knows it may spice things up in the bedroom a little?! 

And last but not least TALK to your partner, if feel you have nothing to talk about talk about politics, thats the quickest way to start a conversation. LAUGH seeing your wife smile or your husband smile brings back forgotten memories of the good times you had and the reason you fell in love in the first place! It really does!

So friends share your thoughts on this and tell me if it helped you! It aids to a successful marriage, I know I am happily married for the past 6 years and going strong.

SEX AFTER MARRIAGE

DATE HIM AGAIN.

Date nights are a must. Mid-week, get out of those sweats and dress up -- and no talking about mortgages, sick parents and the kids' soccer schedules. Get to know the person you married again romantically. 

TAKE A VACATION.

Get out of your routine and. if possible, go on a trip. If there's no money for anything extra, take a long walk, have a picnic dinner or visit a museum; any shared activity that you both enjoy will work. Talking bonds you.

TRY SOMETHING NEW.

Be adventuresome in bed. Try new positions, toys and fantasies. Experiment.

TELL HIM WHAT YOU WANT.

Good communication is a must -- no blame game. Unless your partner is a psychic, tell or show him what you need or want, in bed and out.

FOREPLAY BEGINS IN THE MORNING.

Things like an "I love you" in the morning, a special touch at breakfast, a "thinking of you" text during the workday, and cooking your spouse's favorite dish matter. They all count as foreplay. 

The Strength of Womanhood

Are there differences? I certainly think so, but the core qualities of inspiration from within, integrity, honor and faith remain. The difference is perhaps more one of tone, intuitive sensitivity, refinement and purpose – skillfully crafting our strength into a more gracious expression that nurtures children and loved ones, and that flows, inspires and cooperates harmoniously with the more masculine energies in life. I believe this is what distinguishes us from men.

Our strength is complementary and shines through our compassion and adaptability to the people in our world. We are motivators to friends, family, co-workers, bosses and employees. We are peacemakers, harmonizers. We are the glue that knits families together – that link between the father and the children, with the intuitive ability to understand the feelings and needs of both.

We needn't have power struggles and compete with the men in our lives for seniority or authority. We ought to encourage them to do what they, if for nothing more than the testosterone levels flowing through them, do best. Men need to feel like they can “be men” in order to be able to bring forth their best and put forth their best toward us. And when they do, it blesses everyone. And our strength shines brighter and more beautifully in harmony with theirs.

Of course, no unreasonable or unhealthy excesses are acceptable in the balance between the sexes, but one of our major strengths and glories as women is in adapting, and encouraging and wisely influencing the process for good in harmony and unity, and not competitive self seeking, which divides. We ought to be secure in our sphere and quality of influence.

LOVE

The word "LOVE" we hear it everyday we say it everyday but do we actually know the true meaning of love?

According to the Kama Sutra Vatsayayana there are different kinds of love.

• Love acquired by continual habit.
• Love resulting from imagination
• Love resulting from beliefs 
• Love resulting from the perception of external objects

The love acquired by continual habit: this is constant and continual performance of some act eg. the love of sexual intercourse, the love of drinking, the love of gambling ect..

The Love which is felt for things to which we are not habituated, and which proceeds entirely from ideas, is called love resulting from imagination, as for instance that love which some men and women  feel for the Auparishtaka or mouth congress, and that which is felt by all for such things as embracing, kissing, etc., etc.

The love which is mutual on both sides, and proved to be true, when each looks upon the other as his or her very own, such is called love resulting from belief by the learned.

The  love resulting from the perception of external objects is quite evident and well known to the world. because the pleasure which it affords is superior to the pleasure of the other kinds of love, which exists only for its sake.

Boredom, Stress, Husbands, Kids, Chores..these are some duties and feelings we are all to familiar with. I have decided to create this blog spot for women especially housewives and mommies just like my self to share tips and stories with our fellow women, you can feel free to discuss issues about your marital life, sex life, motherhood, books, movies, dinner, or even if we just need that extra person to talk and relate to.
In my blogs I am going to share helpful tips on how to spark your marriage, how to relate better to your children, and many more interesting topics.
So come aboard girls lets start sharing and relating and find ways to help our fellow housewives to overcome whatever issues they may be having and to ashamed to talk about them to family or friends....